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That's interesting. I've never thought of retaliation ever in a tennis match. Hitting toward the player at the net is just good tennis. I try to hit it at their feet, and they do the same. If I get hit, no big deal - it's part of 4.0/4.5 doubles. Obviously if the match is not even and one team is far better, there is no need to crank up the speed. So I think this speaks to the mixed doubles scenario you mentioned. If the female is a super strong player, i'll play the same as I do against a male of equal ability. If there is a weaker player on the court, male or female, there is no need to pound it at them.
Final thoughts, I never get mad at my oponent if I get hit. The reason is that in the end our team is responsible. We should never have let them get in the position to do that.
Get over it. Its a sport and getting hit in sports is part of the game. Its not like they hit or punched you with fist or racquet, its a tennis ball.
I've been hit many times in tennis and didn't take it personally. I agree with the statement that its smart to go at the net person because they do have less time to react.
I have played Open mixed doubles and had both the women and guys go at me because I was weaker at the net than my super skilled female partner, again I didn't take it personally.
Completely agree that if hit a bad shot, that is what allows the person or team to have an easier sitter. I have also seen where the team gets soft and pushes the ball on an easy put away and the other team wins the point and this momentum carries them through to win the set or match.
Yet if its a social or just for fun, no tourney or non league match, I agree why worry about winning the points too much because the reason doing it is for the social aspect.
The last part of #3 is prob the only one i would have real issues with...all the others...well i have thick skin...and a pretty good aim as well :-)
While we are on this subject another issue that actually I find more offensive and I have had it happen a few times, during tourneys after the points are over most etiquette is to hit or throw the tennis balls to the person serving.
On just a few occasions the opponent would return the ball to me while my back was turned or would hit the balls to the far corner of the side where I was serving.
To me this is more of an issue than during a live point a person go at the net person.
Although overall the very few times these events have happened hasn't affected my opinions on tennis. I have by far encountered many more players and matches where there was no issue.
It is interesting though players don't complain as much if they win the match. So if they win the issues don't come up, yet if the player looses the issue comes up.
I try to avoid judgments based on people and their looks, how they act, etc., and instead look at the conduct of the actions. Society runs into trouble when we start basing judgements on people according to their looks, race, sex, instead what should be evaluated is the conduct of the player.